My 30 year old “sister” (tbh she doesn’t act like one) just started an argument with me because I told her to wash her own dishes… and it sadly somehow lead to a bunch of outrageous shit coming out of her mouth, including her telling me and my girlfriend that we (lesbians) make up all of the problems we face for attention. While doing so she continued to point out the fact that her ex-boss is a lesbian and therefore she must know all, (this boss being the same idiot who doesn’t believe gay marriage is “necessary”). My girlfriend not only identifies as a lesbian, but she’s also a woman of colour with an extremely homophobic family, to the point where they have threatened her. The fact that my sister, a straight/cis/white person, thinks she can tell any queer and/or POC what it’s like to be themselves, or that the struggles that may face aren’t real, infuriates me so so fucking much. I don’t even know how to handle this anymore and I hate being in the same house as her. Her level of ignorance is astounding and it’s taking everything in me not to snap. This is not a one-time occurrence, it’s something that I face almost daily when I am around her. And it’s not just her, I’ve experienced it from many people throughout my life.
So, straight people, listen the fuck up. You do not get to speak for us or tell us our experiences, our struggles, our stories are invalid. If you have LGBTQ+ family members, friends or co-workers it DOES NOT make you some kind of LGBTQ+ expert or immune to being homophobic, and it certainly doesn’t mean you can say ignorant things and back it up with some “I’m not homophobic, I have gay friends/bosses/co-workers/florists/fucking electricians” type of bullshit. I know this has probably been repeated numerous times on this website, but as a lesbian I feel that this is definitely one of the top issues that I cannot stand putting up with anymore.
SO, instead of using the fact that you know or are friends with LGBTQ+ individuals, or whatever other dumb reason you want to use as an excuse to be ignorant, take it as an opportunity to listen and open your mind to what your friends and family may be experiencing. Always support them and be understanding, but also always keep in mind that you, as a straight and/or cis person, are not able to experience what the LGBTQ+ community does, and you cannot speak on their behalf, unless directly asked.
We have one kitten left at work and he does not like to be ignored! He demands you pay attention to his cute!